The Dangers of Toxic Positivity: How Overlooking Negative Emotions Can Impact Mental Health
- Calmfidence Council
- Jan 12
- 3 min read
Updated: Mar 20
Written by: Dr. Mohita Shrivastava, Expert Contributor
Our Expert Contributors are handpicked for their exceptional expertise, delivering actionable strategies that empower holistic entrepreneurial success.
Positive attitude or optimistic approach is a key to move along with the challenges we continuously face in our lives. Think positive
as an attitude, no doubt helps us to preserve a goal by reassuring our desirable thoughts over pessimism. We often hear phrases like "have a positive outlook" or "be optimistic" from our friends and family, particularly when facing difficult situations or when circumstances are less than ideal – disappointing or disheartening, in fact.
But do you believe that "having a positive outlook no matter what" is truly beneficial for our mental health and wellbeing? The simple answer is "No". If a particular situation is unsustainable or not harmonious, why are we so often advised to "stay positive"?
The reason is that a concept known as toxic positivity has been ingrained in our minds as the only acceptable virtue.
Toxic positivity is a belief system that suggests, no matter how dire the situation, one should maintain a positive outlook and reject any negative emotions or feelings. It encourages false positive cover-ups while dismissing the true expression of feelings. Pragmatically, we all experience painful emotions—feelings of disgust, betrayal, blame, or humiliation, a kind of gaslighting effect. Why are these emotions not allowed to be felt or discussed openly, with honesty and integrity, to achieve better physical and mental health?
The Side Effects of Toxic Positivity
It invalidates genuine emotions, preventing the real support one seeks to cope with difficult situations.
It shuts down realistic, pragmatic thoughts about troubling situations, amplifying false reassurances.
It shelves, disdains, or completely quashes true feelings through gaslighting, creating a false narrative of reality that burdens individuals with blame, guilt, and disgust.
It leads to feelings of guilt and shame, diminishes confidence, and lowers drive and motivation for life.
It can result in psychosomatic issues such as headaches, physical pain, anxiety, worry, depression, and fear.
It discourages individuals from acknowledging their true feelings, preventing psychological well-being.
Tackling Toxic Positivity
Do not suppress your emotions and feelings to let them haunt you later. Instead, allow them to surface and resolve them.
Do not let others impose positive affirmations on you, either intentionally or unintentionally.
Understand that trying to pacify someone in their grief or anger can lead to alienation and disconnection.
Address toxic positivity by clarifying what you truly need from others in that moment, rather than welcoming impractical positive advice.
Set clear expectations with others about the emotional support you seek, in line with the situation at hand.
Journal your negative emotions during tough times and reflect on them—consider doing a SWOT analysis (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats).
Speak with a relevant person or try to create an amicable resolution, if possible.
Manage intense negative emotions through mindfulness or nurturing a hobby, but never block them from surfacing.
Understand that both positivity and negativity are part of life. Sometimes the sun shines brightly, and sometimes it’s cloudy. Accept both.
Accept that "not every difficult situation needs a silver lining."
As business leaders, it is essential to foster an environment where both positive and negative emotions are recognised and respected. Encouraging emotional honesty and psychological well-being in your team not only promotes a healthier workplace but also drives long-term productivity and success.
About the Author
Dr. Mohita Shrivastava is an award-winning internationally trained neuroscientist and neuropsychologist, she is the founder of the Cognitome Program. Dr. Shrivastava holds a Ph.D. in Neuroscience from AIIMS, New Delhi, India & completed her collaborative Ph.D. research training from Kansas University Medical Centre, Kansas, USA. She holds two master’s degrees, one in Biomedical Sciences from University of Delhi and other in Applied Clinical Psychology from Annamalai University. She also holds an Advanced PG Diploma in Applied Neuropsychology from University of Bristol, United Kingdom. She has also completed a refresher skill enhancement training on "fMRI in Neuroscience Research'' organised by MGH Athinuola Martino's Centre for Brain Imaging in collaboration with Harvard University, MIT, Massachusetts, Boston, USA in 2021.
She regularly publishes various research articles in international peer reviewed journals.
For more information visit: https://cognitomeprogram.me/
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